Location: Home / / Etsuko's RL Spell

Sure, telekinetic skills a la Uri Geller would be great to wield, but why bend spoons instead of ordering them to feed you? With the 'animate object' spell at one's disposal in real life, one never has to worry about renegade car keys again.

Armed with the spell, ladies can order umbrellas to 'heel' when necessary, never having to fear abominable price hikes in umbrella sales when the clouds are grey. Imagine your husband's wallet obediently following you into malls, combs gently smoothing out your hair as you talk on the cell phone, even better, utensils that clean up after themselves!

Attention, guys - your car keys will never get lost again! Have a heart-to-heart with the remote about the match, eat popcorn literally begging to be eaten, even serenade the girlfriend with an enchanting melody the instrument invented itself.

Not to be left out, younger ones never have to worry about forgetting pencil boxes and calculators on exam days again. Watch blankets fold themselves obediently, dead frogs jumping about in the life sciences lab and even toothbrushes that brush your teeth for you.
I'd like to voice one last stereotype before I close - "Wouldn't life be so much more fun this way?"